A trip to the mall
So, I went to the mall today. I think it would have been far more pleasurable to, say, open my head with a dull manual can opener and extract my brain with a grapefuit spoon, but maybe I'm just making the trip out to be worse than it actually was. You tell me.
To begin our trip, it was pouring rain, thanks to the remnants of Hurricane Ivan. I found a parking spot, only about 1/2 mile from the entrance, got out of the car with 5 of the kids, a double stroller and umbrellas, and away we went. Nikolas wasn't with us, he went to a friend's house. We ran all the way up to the door, and ducked in, just in the nick of time, when the heavens opened. First stop, Lane Bryant for me. See, last night I attempted to go out and get a new outfit for myself. The Hubster and I are going to a company function outside tomorrow night, and I wanted something new to wear. It took me two hours to become so depressed that an entire bottle of Zoloft wouldn't have been enough. WHAT is it with clothing manufacturers? Why is every striped shirt made with horizontal stripes? And made from Lycra, thereby stretching said stripes in a weird pattern, if you are larger than a B cup? I looked all over last night, and finally gave up. I went to Lane Bryant today, figuring that they would be able to cover me. And cover me they did - I spent a ton of money. I had promised the kids that we could get some things for them - after all, these poor kids have no clothes to wear, and nothing to play with - I have no idea how they can tolerate living here in the squalor. So we went over to Limited Too, and just as quickly walked back out. I have no desire to dress my seven and nine year old girls like street walkers. We walked the mall, looking for Vans sneakers - what Allegra wanted to spend her money on. We dropped money in Children's Place and the Disney Store. Mackenzie was so thrilled to be at the mall that she ran all over, forcing other shoppers to dodge her, and causing me to plow the stroller into her several times. We never found the sneakers, and decided that Old Navy would have to be skipped, a fact which led to much pouting in the group.
We finally decided that we had enough, and made our way to the exit. There were four sets of double doors, and we happened to go out the middle one. I had the baby in the sling, I was pushing the double stroller, Gabe was trying to figure out how to work his little umbrella, I was trying to get the big umbrella open, and the girls were arguing over who would hold the door for me. There were three young Navy guys leaving the mall right behind me, exiting the same door, despite the fact that the other three sets of doors were not in use. One said, "God, look, here we are in the middle of the three ring circus!" I turned around, looked at them, and said "I'm trying my best!" "Yeah, right. It's still a three ring circus lady." I was this close to punching the guy right in the eyeball, but said "There are other doors you can use." "I'm glad I'm not you!", he said, and walked off, laughing to his friends. You and me both, buddy.
I was so steamed by this. My girls HELD the doors for this creep, who made fun of their mother and their family, and never thanked them. Some people are jerks.