Mom to the Screaming Masses

And this is when I killed them

Monday was a rainy day.  Sunday had been rainy too.  Come to think of it, I recollect that Saturday may have been as well. 

But Monday was a reallllly rainy day.  It was also Nik's first full day of Scout camp.  And it rained, and dried up for about 6 minutes, and then it rained again.  Lather, rinse, repeat, all day long.  I went for a run that morning, and after 4. 5 miles of oppressive, smouldering humidity, the clouds opened and the rain fell.  I thought that since I was so wet from sweat, I'd just as soon keep running and walking.  I'd think of it as a shower.  Minus the soap, and plus the sweat stinging my eyes.  The Hubster was home with four of the other kids, and I took Criley Riley with me, since no one wanted her at home.  I covered her with an umbrella and went on my merry way. 

When I got home, The Hubster escaped to work and I decided that, after lunch, we'd go rent some movies.  Probabably stop for some goodies, too.  After all, Nik is away for the week, and he's pretty much the instigator.  Usually his week of summer camp is a calm, peaceful time.

It rained pretty much all afternoon.  Finally, at about 4, it stopped and we hustled into the van.  Armed with 6 free video rentals, we went to the local movie shack.  My big girls were really interested in renting Aquamarine, and we snapped that up straight away.  Since The Hubster went into work late, he'd be the late man out, and so I decided to grab a movie for myself. I let the kids pick three movies total, since the forecast for the next couple of days included rain.  And more rain. (As an aside, we've gotten over 7 inches this week alone! Ooh! That kind of sounds like a porn flick!)

I was sweetness personified to my children.  We gathered our movies and drove over to the grocery.  I was determined to continue with the sweetness and light.  You want French bread?  Sure, put it in the cart.  Taquitos?  Absolutely.  Ice cream bars?  Go ahead.  I treated myself to a nonfat vanilla latte from the in store Starbucks.  Life was gooooooood.  They chatted and planned their great movie night with tons of junk.

In the produce section, I grabbed a bag of cherries.  My kids ADORE cherries, but they are here for such a limited time, and cost so much - $3.88 per pound - I rarely buy them.  This was a good day to ask, so I picked them up and turned to look at some red grapes.  I reached my hand out to pick up one of the only two bags available, and another shopper was right there to pull them out of my hand.

Huh?  I shot her a look, and she said to me, "Those are two different fruits you have in your hands."  She nodded towards the offending hands and added, "You have cherries and grapes."  I looked down my nose at her - not hard to do when you are wearing 4 inch wedges! - and came up with the oh, so original, "I know.  That's what I wanted."  My.  I amaze myself with the wit sometimes. 

She muttered under her breath and walked away, shaking her head and palming her bag of grapes.  My bigger bag of grapes.  Whatever, lady.  Tossing the smaller bag into the cart, we grabbed the last couple of items and went to check out.

I watched the clerk ring the groceries, informing her that she had overcharged me for peaches.  White peaches - 2.99 per pound, regular boring peaches - 1.48 per pound, 3 pounds of regular boring peaches, YOU do the math.  She was surly about it and I brushed it off.  When I noticed a second error, and then a third, I was surly right back.  Riley picked the checkout line as the MOST appropriate place to scream, and so all of this was done to the melody of shrieking.

Finally, I was finished and began to walk away.  I looked back and noticed that Mackenzie and Gabriel were still looking at the candy.  "Good bye, guys!  I'm leaving!"  For whatever reason, Allegra decided to go back to them. 

"She's trying to STEAL!"

Oh, crap, was that one of mine?  Well, in a manner of speaking it was.  Allegra was screaming about her sister.  Who wasn't trying to steal, as the candy in question was clearly visible on the counter.  I turned the cart around just in time to see Mackenzie punch Allegra in the stomach, and Allegra reached around and slapped Mackenzie across the face. 

And Riley continued to scream.

I gathered up my children,, holding Allegra and Mackenzie each by their shirt collars.  Promising swift, furious punishment, we went to the door.

Where we discovered that the calm, sunny skies had become the torrential rains of a hurricane.  It was raining so hard that the drops were horizontal.  The wind was whipping to a gale.

And I had my hands full of fighting children, $125 worth of food, and heels on my feet.  Not to mention a cup of coffee and a van parked in the back row of the lot.  And no umbrella for the kids. 

We ran all the way, and upon arrival at the van, I opened the door and tossed in the kids.  It was apparent to me that the store had changed to biodegradable plastic bags, as every.single.bag ripped as soon as hefted.  I lifted and tossed and finally had an empty cart.  I jumped in the van and started it up, and reached down to wring out my shirt.  I looked up

And noticed that I had left my cup of coffee in the cart.

When we got home, I ordered them all upstairs to put on their pj's and then return to the table.  I doled out the first punishment - no movie that night.  Second punishment - handwriting.  100 times for Mackenzie of I will behave in the grocery store and 100 times for Allegra of I will respect my mother and sister.  Except that with the eye rolling and the slamming of the notebook, as well as the huff, Allegra was given 200 times.

They were given a plain sandwich dinner to eat while they wrote. No taquitos, no junk. Immediately upon completion, they were sent to bed.  It was 7 p.m.  All the kids were in bed by 7:15.

It turned out to be a good night for me.

Go on, you know you want to!

Check out today's post over at Larger Families.  It's written by yours truly, and I'd love to have some comments over there, so I can feel the love.

I've got a great post brewing in my head.  I hope I don't lose it........

What happened at the 5K

should stay at the 5K, right?

I'm a dork, though.  I figured since it was a week ago, I could tell you what happened now.

I have this nifty walking gauge thingie that The Hubster bought me with Performance Points.  Performance Points, how I love you with a big sloppy wet kiss.  We've bought ALL kinds of cool stuff from them.  Patio furniture, electronics, kid toys, pool toys, an electric scooter, a carpet cleaner, an Oreck, cameras, dvd players, and we bought a TON of gifts for Christmas and donations last year.

So he bought me this pedometer thing, which works on the GPS system.  (Um, I'm pretty certain that I didn't need that word system there, but whatever.) It calculates how far you've walked or run, what you pace is, and various other stuff.  You can set it to time laps, to compare your current time to your last, yadda yadda.

When I got to the 5K, I had not preregistered.  Mistake #1.  I parked my car at 8:03, and the 10K began at 8, with the 5K beginning at 8:10.  I was late leaving my house, since I had gone back home to talk to The Hubster.  I really didn't feel right going, since it cost $35 and I'm trying to save every dollar I can.  He told me to go.  Smart man. 

I got there, parked, and ran as fast as I could to the registration table.  I passed the starting line, running through and around a crowd of extremely fit, very thin and athletic folks.   I heard the announcer, well, announcing the start in just two minutes.  At the table, the man there informed me that the race had just begun.  Nope, I KNEW it was the 10K and told him so.  He refused to take my money, saying that he was correct and the race had already started.  With a grumpy look and a loud sigh, a woman at the next table motioned me over.  By not preregistering, I didn't get my nifty running backpack filled with goodies, or my tshirt.  But I did get my chip to attach to my shoe.  I grabbed it and ran as fast as I could towards the start.  I heard the crack of the shot and saw that most of the area had rapdily emptied out, and a fresh group of people was congregating.  This group of runners, thank heavens, weren't QUITE so fit and thin.  Yup, it was the 5K group.  I heard the voice announce that the race would begin in two minutes.  I had just enough time to attach the chip to my laces, set up my iPod to the running play list, and set up the pedometer on my wrist.  I went through all of the necessary steps to start it, and then pushed pause.  I stretched my calves as quickly as I could and then we were off!  I had tied my car key to my lace, and about fifteen paces in, my shoe came undone and the key fell off.  I just happened to feel it, and so I stopped and grabbed it.  I made my way to the edges of the group and stopped to retie my shoe.  I ran the entire race holding my key in my sweaty hand.

I ran 9 minutes before I checked my wrist for the display.  Not a bad time, I thought.  I kept running, and a few minutes later, thought to myself, "Holy cow, when am I going to see that 1 mile marker?"  I checked my wrist - 9 minutes. Stupidly, it didn't sink in.  I saw that 1 mile marker, eased off and walked for a bit.  I decided I'd walk for 2 tenths of a mile, and checked my wrist.  9 minutes. 

Yup, I had PAUSED the unit.  I'm slick that way.

When I got to the 2 mile marker, I grabbed 2 cups of water from the table and gulped one cup and dumped the other over my head and down my back.  I heard someone gasp and realized that I had dumped some on my neighbor.  Whoops.  I apologized and hung back a bit, letting him get ahead of me. 

Up ahead, I saw a commotion.  Getting closer, I saw a crowd of people around one man.  He was an older man, probably in his 70's, who had fallen and cut himself.  He was really embarrassed.  I can only imagine.

I crossed the finish line, after having my picture taken 5 times, in 38 minutes.  I made CERTAIN that I was running each and every time that I saw a camera, and yet, one of the pics online had me walking.  Making my way to the table, I finagled a tshirt out of the helpful woman, thumbed my nose at the grumpy man, and set out to find the snack table.  Not hard to do - I merely followed the scent of pizza.

Yup, we were served hot pizza at 9 in the morning, when it was 85 degrees and we were all hot and exhausted from running.  There were bagels and fruit and water, but the pizza was, surprisingly enough, a big hit.  Not with me, though.

Thinking about all of this, I decided to take my measurements today.  When I first started this quest, I took them faithfully every week.  I was so frustrated with this that I put the paper away in April.  April 5, to be precise.

But here it is June 24, and I thought I'd do some comparisons.  Just for kicks, you know.

                                Beginning                   Current

bust, middle and band   43/32                      39.5/31

waist                         36                              31.5

hips                           44                              40.5

thigh circumference     26                            23.5

That, my dear friends, is, according to my math challenged brain, FIFTEEN inches. 

I finally feel like I'm getting somewheres.

OH!  And Chris has totally redeemed herself - she photoshopped my portrait and sent it to me for your viewing laughter pleasure.  Try not to laugh too hard.....

Today was the day

"Today, mama?  Today, today, today?"  Three eager faces looked up at me, and I suppressed a giant sigh.  "Yes, today is the day."

Amid their shouts of glee, I closed up the laptop and stood.  I called all of the kids to the table.  Gabe, Mackenzie and Emma - ages 6, 8 and 3 - met me at the table with pencils, notebooks, and flash cards.  They were so excited!  I was so

NOT.

Yeppers, today was the day that we began our summer schooling program.  The school sends home the workbooks, and I always have the kids finish them up over the summer.  We shoot for an hour of work a day, but take the first two weeks of summer completely off.  Especially since this is the first year we aren't able to afford to send them to any summer programs.

I had lots planned.  Emma is old enough to learn her letters and numbers, Gabe needs to work on his handwriting and firm up his addition facts.  Oh, wait, I think I forgot to tell you that Mackenzie had her standardized testing, and every single score was 99% OR ABOVE.  Holy crap, in the words of Ray's dad Frank (on my new favorite sitcom to watch).  She needs to work on nothing, but puts such intense pressure on herself that I need to give her work just to keep her sane.  (As a funny, a teacher of hers once told me that I really need to slack off on the pressure to her, as it was becoming a problem.  Um, hello?  She's the third kid, there's no pressure there from me.  She often gets forgotten, much to my chagrin.The pressure is ALL her, all the time.)

Oh MY, you people who homeschool your kids, and especially those of you who homeschool lots more than one child.  I bow DOWN to you.

Nik was working on a report for his Environmental Science Boy Scout Merit badge, and needed me to proofread every other word.  Allegra was trying to remember how to divide fractions, and getting more and more upset, ultimately sobbing that she'd never been taught this math skill and was stupid.  She threw her pencil across the room.  Emma wanted me to teach her the sound for EVERY letter, Riley kept shoving books in my face so she could "read", Mackenzie wanted me to check the three pages she'd already done and assign her some MORE work, and Gabe was laying on the floor, making gurling noises, pretending to be dead so he didn't have to copy the sentence, I like to swim in the pool.  Everyone was talking at once, over each other, screaming to be heard. 

Whose idea was it to have TEN weeks off of school? 

Can't I hire someone else to do this?

It's only an hour, for the next 8 or so weeks.  I can do this, right?

9 items or less

Item #1

Low fat or diet items that aren't bad:

• Low fat latte ice cream from Starbucks
• Propel fitness water in Mango
• diet coke with lime
• reduced fat cheese - not the greatest ever, but not bad
• The wish bone red wine spritzer is really good on salads and cut up veggies

Diet items that I can't stand:

• Cookies made with splenda - an experiment gone terribly wrong, as the three times I baked with it, all of the food went into the garbage
• All kinds of diet coke other than with lime
• Healthy choice or South Beach pizza
• non fat cheese

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Item #2

I was sent a link for my picture from the last 5K I did.  It cracks me up, how many professionals that they have out at each run, taking shots of each of us.  I wanted to post it, but the cost to download the picture was $25.  Sorry.  I can't do that.  BUT, if I wanted to, I could buy a coffee mug, a photo luggage tag, trading cards or a matted and framed 8x10 glossy of my fat, huffing and puffing red faced self running down the street.  Can you IMAGINE coming into my house and seeing a huge pic of THAT?

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Item #3

Anyone have any idea why the battery on my Toshiba laptop is so cruddy?  It will only hold the charge for about 45 minutes.  I've got to get a new one before BlogHer, but everyone I talk to about it has never heard of needing a new battery for a laptop. Between that, and I'm STILL not getting many of my emails, well, I'm cranky.

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Item #4

If you aren't reading Mir's newest Wantnot, shame on you.  In today's post, she's talking vacuum cleaners.  I realized that I haven't ever shared my vac story.  I had a Hoover, and it was pretty good.  Until the day that I plugged it into the wall, and began to vacuum.  Sparks came from the plug, and by the time I got over there to unplug it, there was actual FLAME.  Flame, people, is not what you want to see when you are cleaning.  So I bought a Dyson, since it was so highly recommended for those with asthma and allergies.  I'm here to tell you that it sucked, big time, and not in a good way.  It's the worst vacuum cleaner I've ever used.  So, we used Performance Points at The Hubster's job to shop, and we bought an Oreck. Bought for free, my favorite way to shop!  That, my friends, is a good vacuum.  When we bought it, we were given a free compact vacuum for the stairs.  It came with a shoudler strap, and I pretend sometimes that I'm a warrior with the unit strapped to my back.  I'm lame, I know........

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Item #5

I had a post up at Larger Familes yesterday, but since I never changed the date on the draft from May 24 to yesterday, it was at the bottom of the blog.  Did anyone see it?  Do you all read me over there?  I am really liking that blog a lot.  I hope you all do too!

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Item #6

Taking a page from Mary over at Owlhaven, I no longer separate my wash.  Much.  Sometimes I do, and I still feel like I need to bleach the whites once in a while.  But I've been tossing a lot of it in together and we've not had any problems.  Colors are still the same, so I'll quit separating for a while and see how it goes.  Do you separate, or just toss it all in?

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Item #7

Last night, I watched the old Joan Crawford movie Mildred Pierce.  It's a long, convulted story, but the name Mildred Pierce is used in The Hubster's family as an insult/compliment. I have a copy of this movie, and never watched it.  Last night, I turned on the tv and there it was, so I watched it.  That was a GREAT movie.  I'd highly recommend it.  Not recommended, though, would be watching reruns of Everybody Loves Raymond while running on the treadmill.  OMG, I've not laughed this hard in a long time.  Do you remember the episode where Ray and Deborah take the lie detector test adminstered by Robert?  How about when Frank comes in with the t-shirt on that says "I'm with stupid", and the arrow points to Marie?  I just about wet myself, and had to stop the treadmill by pulling the cord. 

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Item #8

I've hit a plateau with the weight loss, and I'm ok with it, I think.  I wore a tank top and a skort to Wal-Hell today, and got more that one look and even a whistle.  Not that I'm looking for that, but it's nice to be noticed, kwim?  Or at least to be noticed in a good way, not that fat chick over on aisle 4.  And, I KNOW that women aren't supposed to like being whistled at - it's degrading and not for feminists.  Ok, whatever.  It still felt good today.  I'm not embarrassed to wear shorts this summer, or tank tops.  I think I look, not super, but not too bad. 

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Item #9

I'm going to dinner tonight with some girlfriends, and the restaurant has a lot of frou-frou food and a martini bar.  Wanna guess what my dinner will be tonight?

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Bonus items that I'm sneaking through the express lane:

Push ups on an incline, as suggested in my comments section, are very much harder than girlie pushups, but not as hard as full on man pushups.  It's a good compromise - I did 40 last night on a 45 degree incline.  It was *hard*, people - I did 20, and then 10 and 10 more very s-l-o-w-l-y. 

Anyone getting good summer color????

RUN, don't walk, to your local Old Navy and check out their discontinued line of Kiss my Face stuff, in white chocolate/orange.  YUM.  I bought CHEAP soap and body wash and lotion yesterday.  I think I'm going back to get stuff for Christmas. It's all 50-75% off, so I'm talking literally $3 or less.

Attention, Target shoppers!

I'd like to apologize to the Target shoppers in my fair city.

The two boys, one a big, grown up looking high schooler and the other a first grader wearing goggles over his glasses, the ones bouncing the 42 inch diameter ball up and down the aisles?  They really didn't mean to slam your cart that way, and I'm really sorry that you felt that your baby was being attacked.  I can see how that would make you a bit nervous, and could make you scream.  Especially when the ball went sideways and knocked the lamp off the shelf.

The man who was weighing the merits of one type of towel over another, debating the color red versus the color blue?  Well, he just doesn't get out much.  He wanted to get his dad new towels for Father's Day, since the ones at his dad's house have pretty much disappeared.  The Hubster just has a hard time making up his mind.  Wrapping each of us up in a towel, in order to gauge the proper size, just helps him that much more.

Those two girls, over in the girls section, the ones who apeared to be unsupervised?  They were with me too.  See, it's not enough that the floor of their room is covered in clothing, the area immediately behind the hamper is full of clothes - although the hamper is empty - and the closets are wall to wall.  It's not enough that they were given four five six boxes of clothes that are new to them; it's a fact of their lives that when we go to Target, they must try to find a new piece of clothing to try to convince me of their need to own.  They did find capri pants - size 4 and 6x, for girls who wear 7 and 12.  I understand how those sizes are pretty similar, especially since they had adustable! waistbands! but I just felt like being mean and saying no.  Really, the pouty lower lips just get me every.single.time.  It's too cute!

The little girl who was waving the Hello Kitty pj's?  She was the only happy one.  Except when I wouldn't add on the Hello Kitty shirt, shorts, capri's and bathing suit coverup.  After all, when one momogrammed item is good, seventeen more must be better.  The part where she tripped on the jammies that she was dragging along the floor, and fell down on the floor and her siblings laughed, well, that just made it all worthwhile.

The two year old, the one screaming loud enough to set off an alarm, well, she did have a reason.  She couldn't get a copy of The National Enquirer into the cart.  That, and the injustice of actually having to PAY for her Elmo Sprinkler. 

I really apologize, and I'll try to avoid Target again in the forseeable future.  My wallet will agree with your request, I'm certain.

Busy, busy Friday

Today I went to the thrift store to drop stuff off.  I delivered The Hubster his wallet and money.  I bought sneakers for two of my kids, looked for a Bible for The Hubster - he requested it for Father's Day - and then I went to the butcher.  I came home, paid the bills, balanced the checkbook, sobbed a bit and poked my eyes out with a rusty skewer.  Nikolas barbecued burgers for dinner, Allegra made a cereal snack mix and I made penne with tomato, basil and mozzarella for dinner, along with a cut up canteloupe and grapes. When I was finished, I did this:

(click to enlarge)

I also did one that says Grandpa, for my dad and my father in law.

What are you planning to give for Father's Day?

There's a bipolar just waiting to happen

I love my blog.  I hate my blog.

See how weird that is?  But, really, I mostly do love my blog.  I especially love the wonderful comments that you all left for me.  Two days ago, I was annoyed and frustrated with everyone.  Now, I've got more love for all of you!  Your emails, they REALLY brought my spirits up, and it was so nice to see some positive email.  Which, now, I'm getting.  I just hate the random ugly comments that I receive, but as one commenter said, it's a sign that I'm popular!  Don't hate me because I'm popular!

So, chocolate for all of you, except for Missy and Concerned.  I did discover how incredibly easy it is to figure out exactly who anonymous commenters are - that was really eye opening to me.  I had no idea - well, I won't tell you what I found, just that it was interesting.

Good news:  in a marathon, 2 hours on the phone, I was able to change my airline reservation, for less than I thought.  The Hubster is ok with me going an extra day; in fact, he said that I deserve it.  So, yay him!  I'm staying with Chris the first night - that is, if I'm still talking to her, since apparently everyone loves her more than me.  Humph.

Bad news:  While wearing a pair of wedges, I caught my foot in the sidewalk downtown and wrenched my ankle.  It's not pain, but discomfort that goes up my leg.   I didn't run today, to let it rest.  I'm hoping it's better tomorrow.

Good news:  I'm probably going to run the 5K this weekend, if my ankle isn't still sore.  I'll do it in my old shoes.  Later, I'll make a trip to the running store that I didn't know existed and see what they recommend.  On a shoestring (ha!) budget, of course.

Better news:  I broke 30 pounds.  I did.  T-h-i-r-t-y.  My goal was 40, and I find that I've pretty much lost my desire.  How sad is that?  All this work, and I just want to give up.  Actually, I just want to eat.  Ice cream, mexican food, cream, pasta, just food in general. 

Bad news:  My kids have decided that they don't need to sleep any more.  It's 10:00, and two of them are still awake.  It wouldn't be so bad if they were awake in BED, but they have to get up a million times and fight with each other.

Good news:  I cleaned out my fridge and microwave.  Gross.  Gross. It's done, though.  The fridge is so empty that it shines.  Thursday is payday.........

Bad news:  I've read all of my books, and have no money to get anything new.  Can you all recommend some of the best books that you've read, that I could get at the library?  I donated 40 55 books to the church book sale. Books that were cluttering up the space.

Good news: I can do 80 pushups now.  25 at a time, with 30 in the final set.  My triceps still flap.  The Hubster says if I could do that many REGULAR pushups, not girlie kind, my arms would be rock solid.  Can't be done, though.

So-so news:  I've got stuff to sell on ebay, to make some cashola.  Anyone who has sold on ebay got some advice?  Anything I should know?  I'm going to do tie dye too. 

If you want a good, cheap drink, try Starbucks black iced tea with sugarfree vanilla added.  Yum.  Venti is around $2, and no calories and tons of flavor.

BlogHer

I'm going to Blogher next month.  I've already bought my plane ticket, with the reimbursement from the big hospital case that took on my insurance company, and I've already paid for my conference fees - and VERY importantly, my cocktail hour fees - with babysitting money. 

There's just one slight problem. I want to go a day earlier.  According to the airline company, which shall remain namless except for the fact that a) they just merged with America West and b) their name contains the three letters U S and A, spread out a bit differently, well, this is a crime.

Here is my honest to God letter that I am faxing and mailing tomorrow, as well as following up with yet another of the ninety jillion complaint calls.  Or maybe I'll just poke my eyeballs out with dull skewers.  It seems more effective.

Dear hotshot senior VP in charge of customer non service,

     I am writing to you to express my extreme annoyance with the way that my upcoming flight is being handled by unnamed airline.  I purchased a ticket for a flight to

San Jose

,

CA

, through America West.  I purchased this ticket online, at the America West website, on March 9, 2006 for the price of $395.30.  My confirmation number was given to me as random numbers.  This flight was to take place on July 28 and was booked as follows:

removed due to weirdo lurkers

My return flights were booked as follows:

ALSO removed due to weirdo lurkers

One month after making these reservations, I received two phone calls informing me that due to the merger of America West and airline from HELL, my flights were changed.  I was given new flight numbers, which are as follows:   blah blah and blah for my departure flights, and more random nonsense for return.  I inquired at this time if I was able to change my flight to one day earlier, on the same flights, as several members of the party that I am meeting would be arriving earlier.  I was told that this would not be a problem, but to please wait until closer to the time of departure before attempting this, due to chaos from the merger.

I called 866.523.5333 on June 8, waited 46 minutes on hold, and then spoke with Angie in the customer service department.  She told me that there would not be a problem with the change, but that I would have to pay the $100 fee, as well as any difference in fare cost.  I was happy to do this, but she was unable to tell me the difference in fare cost.   Despite three different requests, she continued to tell me that the cost would be $100, plus the difference in fare.( Get it?  She never could tell me the difference in the fare - even though that is HER JOB) She also informed me that it would be difficult to do, as my original ticket was America West.  Finally, she referred me to a different department at 800.235.9292. 

     I called this number, and after 39 minutes on hold, was told that this change was possible for me to do myself, online, but that the agent would be happy to help me.  While I was waiting for her to find the fare, I went online and located the same itinerary, at a current cost of $528.  This would have been a difference in cost to me of $133, plus the $100 rebooking fee.  I was happy to do this, but the agent stated that the fare she was able to fill was $858, not including the $100 fee.  This represented a cost difference to me of $463, plus the $100 rebooking fee.  She told me that this was due to the fact that it was an America West ticket.  She also told me to book it online, using the “manage my ticket” section, and I was unable to do that, as the site kept telling me that my ticket was invalid.  She did inform me that a cheaper set of return flights, which would land me at home earlier, were available, you really want to know, don't you? respectively. 

    I recalled 800.235.9292, spoke with another representative after 56 minutes on hold and was told that this change was possible, but that I’d need to do it in person.  I drove to my local airport, 45 minutes away,WITH SIX KIDS and was met by a counter agent who informed me that the ticket price was now $1037.30.  The internet fare of $528 was still available at this time. 

   All I am trying to do is leave for my conference one day earlier.  I will be using the same exact flight numbers, just 24 hours in advance.  I travel a great deal with worst airline evah, most recently in the company of 200 others as we traveled for a conference in

Los Cabos

,

Mexico

.  I have been satisfied with the handling of my flights, until this situation.  Please help me to resolve this conflict in a manner that is satisfactory to both of us.

Very truly yours,

A whacked out MTTSM

What you think?  Do I have a snowballs chance in hell?  I'm certainly going to try.  SOMEONE has to keep an eye on Chris and make sure she behaves. 

Privacy

The Hubster and I are a bit different with regards to privacy issues.  He can't take his shirt off in the house without all of the windows closed.  He's constantly checking to see if the blinds are closed, before he comes downstairs without a shirt on.  Me, well, I'm not walking around nekkid or anything, but if it's light outside and the blinds are up, you can't see in the house, right?  So, I've been known, at the end of my work out, to whip off my shirt.  After all, I've got on a ginormous bra, which covers more of than lots of bathing suits.  I'll take my clothes off in the laundry room and run upstairs, which is a route that doesn't pass by any windows, in my underpants.  Shield your eyes, THAT'S an ugly picture!

The point is, you'll never ever ever see him outside without a shirt on, except at the pool.  Even then he sometimes will wear a shirt.  He's not one of those garden topless kind of guys.

So he came home from painting at his dad's house.  He was covered in paint.  It was everywhere.  He came in the house, carefully checked all of the windows, and began to remove his paint encrusted pants and shirt.  He gingerly stepped out of his pants, groaning that his legs were so sore and he'd certainly regret this in the morning.  He walked over to the laundry room, after having me check to see that the kitchen windows were closed. I was one of those people that walks in the front of the king, making certain the way is clear of all hazards. All clear, all clear, let's go! I reassured him that he was totally shielded.  He decided to put his sneakers out in the garage - which he NEVER does- and opened the door.

Only to discover that he'd left the outside garage door, the big one, open to the neighborhood.  And he was in his underpants.

I swear to you, the man makes me need to wear Depends on a daily basis.  My stomach hurt for two hours, I laughed so hard.

Has anything like this ever happened to you or your spouse?