I wrote up a ginormous post about my second day at Blogher. It was a THING of BEAUTY, full of how I went for a run through a homeless camp - by accident - when the front desk guy tried to direct me to a Starbucks, how I went to the mall to buy Benefit cosmetics - because I've never seen them before and I wanted to try them before I ordered them - and Jenny the gorgeous let me borrow her car and I almost killed Chris with my amazing lack of ability to shift gears. It was a post full of my new found love of Lemon Drop Martinis, my hatred of the fact that the hotel couldn't seem to keep an internet connection, and how I got lost coming back from Starbucks and went two miles out of my way. And how I had to accost a woman at an ATM at 6:15 to tell me which direction I needed to go.
I wanted to tell you that my inner introvert had come out the day before, after a decade long haitus, and I was finding it surprisingly uncomfortable to be around some people. I planned to tell you that I laid out at the pool for a while, reading an Oprah magazine and contemplating where I wanted to take my life, my blog, and my dirty laundry.
I planned to tell you about my third day, where I was INTERVIEWED for a big time newspaper, and I met a wonderful woman at a session who may be able to help me crack into magazine blogging. (hyperventilate.....) I wanted to tell you how I mentioned all my readers - yes, even you over there - when I spoke at the How has Blogging changed your life? panel, when I spoke about body images and how I almost peed my pants in nervousness. Dude, my voice is totally on a podcast.
I had PLANNED to tell you how I met so many amazing women and now have an incredible pile of business cards to work through and a ton of new blogs to discover. Women like Karen of Troll Baby, Stacy of Jurgen Nation, Kris of Mama Likey, Heather of No Pasa Nada, Donna of SoCal Mom, Danielle of foodmomiac, Becky of Miss Priss, Lassa, Karianna of the Karianna Spectrum, and so many others that I can't even remember, and need to read through the stack of business cards to discover. I totally would have told you that I stalked Y and made her nuts, and she came to my room and we ate brownies together.
If I'd had a connection, I would have blogged about the fact that the meals weren't very good, but they were pretty much hotel food, and I really wasn't eating very much anyway. I WAS drinking, though. I would have blogged about the fact that I had my own hotel room and I could have danced naked in my room, if I'd wanted. Which I didn't, but I totally could have. I could have told you that I forgot my cord to download my pictures. That's ok, since I only took 6, I think. I might have told you that I dumped coffee on another white shirt, right in front of Jenny. I probably would have told you that I chatted a lot of people up, and they looked at me like I was a freak.
I should have told you that I sold about 25 pieces of tie dye, a deeply disappointing amount. I would have told you about the little teeny tiny birds in the hotel lobby, in a cage, birds that scared me whenever I walked by. I would, and probably will, next post, talk about how it felt to meet so many different woman, and wonder exactly what I was doing here. I probably would have attempted to explain exactly how wonderful Lisa Stone makes me feel, and how I attempted to repay her incredibleness by answering any questions that I was asked about the ad network.
I would have told you that I WAS in the newspaper, TWO columns worth, and I met an incredible woman from iVillage, and changed my seat on the first flight in order to talk her ear off. I might or might now have told you how I walked through the airport and sat for my four HOUR connection, and how incredibly fast and easy the WiFi was there. The Hyatt needs to learn a thing or two about that.
I'd have probably said that it was hard to stay on my diet. I did wear my bathing suit and not feel too bad, so that was a step up.
I might or might not have told you that the woman I spoke about before, who didn't want to tell me her private site and gave me a fictitious name, was wearing a name tag with a THIRD different name on Friday night. Then she sat near me and listened to my conversation most of the night. Hmmmm......
But, I didn't tell you any of that since I had NO connection most all of the weekend, and when I did get a connection it would cause my computer to crash. The Hyatt needs to learn about hosting 700 women with laptops, and actually ALLOWING them to go online more than once every five hours.
So, what would you like to know, my loyal readers? Any of you that went, what did you think?