Mom to the Screaming Masses

A new year, a new you

My favorite activity to bring in the New Year is the traditional changing over of the calendar.  I spend an hour or so looking over the last year's calendar, and transferring the birthdays/anniversaries/special activities to the new, pristine calendar.  It's sooo cool to me to see things like attempt first ever 5K way back in April of last year, and know that I'm going to do my SIXTH one tomorrow.  I spend a minute or two thinking about each birthday as I write it in, and reminisce about that day and the person.  Inevitably I realize that there are three birthdays in the first month and I'm unprepared.

Year end clean up

I'm tying up a few loose ends before I talk tomorrow about why I love the end of the year.

Answers to a few questions asked in comments:

Way back a long time ago, a reader asked me what type of bread that I had found without High fructose corn syrup.  That's a toughie - almost every commercial loaf out there has the stuff in it.  There is one brand that I've found that is HFCS free, and that is by Nature's Own.  It's called Nature's Own 100% whole wheat with 24 grams of whole grain per slice.  What a weird name.  All of the other Nature's Own does have the HFCS, so you have to look carefully. 

Searching

The family and I are attending a wedding next month.  My step daughter is getting married, in Florida. 

I'm searching for three things, and I would like your help.  Can you locate the following:

a) a hotel in Jacksonville, Neptune Beach or St Augustine that is clean, has suites and an indoor pool, and is not going to cost us the equivalent of the national debt?

b) a great dress to wear?  I found one that I really love - except that I realized today that it won't work.  Why?  Because I'd need a halter bra with it, and I can't buy one off the rack.  I'd have to order one and I don't feel like spending that kind of money on an item I won't wear all that often.  Criteria for the dress - not tight on the butt area, no loud prints or patterns, no contrasting belts, if it has no sleeves, you have to show a wrap with it as well.  (The Hubster actually thinks that this one is too revealing, but my burqa is at the dry cleaners.)  We will be in a church, and I don't think it's that warm in FL in January.  Afternoon wedding, not too fancy. I like green, black, nothing pale.  I now have dark brown hair, with highlights, and am pretty fair complexion wise.  No more than about $150 or so.  I've got Dillards, Macy's, Nordstroms, and the like here, as well as my trusty friend Amazon and I can always order it.  I am about a size 12, I think.  For my own personal reasons I'd like to look extremely amazing.  I can't tell you why, but I'm certain that you are all smart enough to figure it out...

3) shoes to go with the great dress.  Kalisa actually showed me some really cute ones, so I may be set with these.  Or similar.

And, a bonus - I've got to find a bathing suit.  That shouldn't be too hard, right?  My last suit was a Miraclesuit and I loved it, so I think I'm going to get another one just like that.  Only a couple of sizes smaller. 

Oh, and must not forget.  I've got to find the mind that I must have lost to agree to go on this trip.  A minimum of 12 hours in a large van with six kids who make the Vietnam conflict look like a walk in the park, and a man who fell asleep at the wheel four years ago and totalled a car.

Can't get nothin' past this kid

Last night, late, after I'd done all of my work, I realized that I was hungry.  I generally don't snack before bed, but we'd had a late lunch/early dinner, and so I felt like I would be too hungry to sleep without a snack.  Yeah, whatever.  Total justification.  I looked in the fridge for a snack, but couldn't find anything that I was craving.  I had my intrepid buddy Riley with me.  She'd taken a nap earlier and was finding it hard to go back to sleep.  Who am I kidding, she finds it hard to sleep every night.  I've never seen a 3 year old who requires so little sleep.  Opening the freezer, I spied a piece of ice cream cake, left over from Allegra's birthday.  Perfect.  It wasn't too big, and I could eat it quickly.  I wasn't sharing it, though. 

I sent Riley to lay on the sofa while I grabbed the container and a spoon.  Moving carefully, I shielded my bounty from her eyes as I walked into the family room. I sat down on the end of the sofa opposite my daughter.  It was dark in the room, and the television was on.  She was engrossed in an episode of Little House on the Prairie - I think it was the one where Laura feels guilt over her baby brother's death and runs off to the mountains.  Very dramatic.  I placed a pillow on its end between the two of us, as a barrier.  Easing the lid from the container, I popped the spoon in and pried off a corner of the cake.  I turned my head in the other direction and quietly slid bliss on a spoon into my mouth.  I made absolutely no noise whatsoever.

If you are ever bored

Go shopping the day after Christmas.  Try taking six kids, each of whom have between $20 and $65, to Barnes and Noble the day after Christmas.  Barnes and Noble at the mall.

Shudder.

No, seriously, it really wasn't too bad.  We started off in the sporting goods store, ostensibly to return a polar fleece that The Hubster bought for me.  There wasn't a larger one - bless his heart, he bought it too small - and so I had to wait in line to get it back from the clerk and buy a new football for Nik.

He's decided that he really wants to play football next year and has focused on becoming a kicker.  He's gotten really good at it, too.  We bought another football, since it's pretty tiring to kick it and run to retrieve it all day.  I'm going to get a few more, but I'm willing to bet that they are cheaper at Wal-Mart.  Which is a place that I won't go until after the first of the year.  For obvious reasons.

Riley had a meltdown in the sporting goods store - a true, honest to God, embarrassing one.  It's been so long since she's had one that I'd almost forgotten what it was like to be out in public while it went on.  My, can people stare.  It's hard to differentiate between an autistic meltdown and just a spoiled brat. 

I was very, very bad for Christmas

After spending the past twelve months eating healthy and exercising (almost) daily, I caved today.  Big time.

Breakfast:  2 cans Starbucks doubleshot light - seriously good, lowfat and low calorie espresso.  If it's cold, pretty tasty.  I began the day correctly, any way.  Then I ate holiday bread, made with stewed apples and nuts and icing and lots and lots of fat.  Did stockings with the family, and was the pleased and proud, although not surprised, recipient of a bunch of Benefit makeup.  (It totally pays to do my own shopping.)

Lunch:  We did multiple finger foods, which the kids chose.  Chicken strips - ate none.  Bagel pizzas - three.  Spinach and artichoke appetizer with Gold Tostitos - ate the entire TGIF's frozen tray.  Serves, I think, three.  Mozzarella sticks - two.  Washed down with a Diet Mt. Dew.  Opened many, many presents.  Received five running shirts, running pants, running gloves and hat and polar fleece and ear warmer.  Love it all, but felt guilty over the HUGE amount of food in my stomach. 

The Hubster left to go to see The Nativity Story with the big kids and his dad, and my neighbor brought over gingerbread cookies.

Maximum overload has been reached

We will allow nothing further.

I delivered flowers for four hours today - I can always use the money and the couple who own the store can always use the help on the big four delivery days - day before Christmas, day before Easter, day before Mother's day, and the biggest day of all, Valentine's day.  So I drove about 56 miles, crossing into two cities and making about 15 deliveries.  Not too bad.  When I was finished, I took my kids to a gift wrapping party - lots of great food, company, and the opportunity to wrap some gifts without prying eyes.  Good times indeed.  I sat with a friend for a while and relaxed, and thought about how great it was that I was ready for Christmas.

It was when I got home that it all went to hell.  It's the REST of my life that I'm not ready for.

See, I had bought two bottles of ATF transmission fluid, as the level in my van is low.  While driving home, my kids kept telling me, "Boy, it really stinks in the car."  It did smell strange, but I'd been delivering flowers, most of them with lots of pine, and it smelled a bit piney.  Two arrangements had birds of paradise, and one had calla lillies, so I assumed that the smell was a residue of the flower scent.  Some of those things smell.  We drove home with the windows open. 

When we got home, I decided to clean out the van.  While mucking it out, I noticed a red fluid on the floor - the vinyl floor, thanks be to God for mercy right there.  I began to wipe and realized that the fluid was the cause of the smell.  Hmmm, did the pine branches leak off that much sap?  Nope.  Turns out that someone stepped on a bottle of tranny fluid and it popped, leaking all over the car. 

Great.

Two birthdays for the price of one

Today was my daughter Allegra's 12th birthday.  Twelve years old - not quite a teen in numbers, but definitely giving teenagerhood a run for the money in attitude.  Whoo, boy.

Today was also my daughter Riley's 3rd birthday.  Three years old - no longer a baby, not yet a preschooler.  Just out of diapers, not ready to write, or read.

Twelve years ago, I had just finished the longest labor I ever thought possible - 36 hours.  It started on Tuesday the 20th at about 2, right after a doctor appt.  I labored through the night and all the next day and night, finally going to the hospital at 2 a.m.  I ended up finishing the task shortly before 5 in the morning on the 22nd. With no drugs, thank you very much.

Let's be nice to ourselves, shall we?

Tonight was my oldest son's band concert.  It went really well, but he told me that it started at 7.  We arrived at 6:30 to get him there early, and made our way to the theater.  Me and the other five kids.  We waited and waited, and the concert started at 7:30.  So my kids sat for an hour.  By the time it was over - and it was really a good concert - my kids were either a) asleep b) crying or c) trying to do either.  It wasn't fun for any of us, and I wondered why I put all of us through it.

Earlier in the week I fielded a call from a friend, who was in tears.  She is a great person, who is having a really hard time.  She is a perfectionist about lots of stuff, painting her own house and growing her own veggies, making all foods from scratch and homeschooling her preschoolers.  She sews her own clothing and that of her kids and basically holds herself to a really high standard. Much higher than I think is a good idea for anyone. I was able to understand a lot of what she was talking about as I saw it all in my own self. 

She was sad and I was sad for her.  The things I told her made me think of things that I probably need to work on.

Answers, part III

Aguh.  My kids are out of school for the Christmas break - except for High school, which goes to school until Friday.  The countdown is on, 14 days until school goes back.  Here are the answers to the rest of the questions.

Amanda asks: What's your one best piece of advice to a first time mom?  Get a sling, not a baby bjorn, and be prepared with meals ahead of time.  Or have friends that will bring you meals.  You have no idea how much time that baby will take, and even fast food will be a distant mirage. 

Brandy asks: When is the last time you worked on your book?  Oh, um, well, a while ago.  I keep thinking about it, and have plot lines laid out in my head, and I just haven't done it.  I started two others though - does that count?  I told The Hubster that this coming year will be time for me to buckle down - I have finally gotten the exercise thing together, and now I need to make the writing a habit as well.

Kyla asks : What am I doing wrong? How do I get him to stop? Is there still hope that he will one day become the beautiful gay fashion designer with a loft in Soho and a gorgeous partner who makes me gourmet meals and goes boutique shopping with me when I come to visit that I am dreaming of?  This was a question about her son hitting, but I thought that the end of her question was so funny that I put it here.  Alas, I have no sure fire advice.  Just keep telling him it's wrong, put a punishment in place, maybe let him know that it hurts you, and know that it will pass.  I'm sorry - it stinks and there is really no way to make him stop.  If you all have any advice, please pass it on, 'kay?