Mom to the Screaming Masses

You Know You're Getting Older

I went to get an eyebrow and lip wax this week.  Yes, I'm one of THOSE hairy beasts.  I SHOULD go every two weeks, but being cheap and a weenie, I stretch it out as long as I can - to a month or two, sometimes.

Yeah, I know.

I went back into the inner sanctum of the pedicure place - in other words the teeny, tiny, undecorated room containing nothing more than an unpadded bed covered with a paper sheet and a crock pot of hot wax.  I kicked back and waited for the attendant to return - she'd walked out with a polite nod and a quiet, deferential, "Someone will be with you in a moment."  She came right back in with her hair pulled into a pony tail.  Was she supposed to be the "someone different"?  She had different hair, so theoretically it was possible.  She looked at my face and pulled my hair back with a headband. 

"What we doing?"  she asked. 

"Lip and eyebrows."  I said, pointing.

Making Life (Or At Least Mealtime) Easier, Volume Five

Sunday was a nice day.  A nice, nice day.

I reached my breaking point on, or about, Wednesday.  I snapped, lost my cool, and my composure, not to mention my mind, and went batshit crazy for a leetle while.  To put it bluntly, I scared everyone, mostly myself and my husband. And, uh, may have shaken my kids up just a little bit. 

Yeah.  It was that kind of day.

But I realized something very powerful.  I'm only one person, and I'm doing the work of about 73 on any given day.  If I don't take care of me, the entire family suffers - as was evident Wednesday night.  I'd given up my martial arts classes two nights in a row to do kid stuff, the attitudes weren't pretty, the grades coming home weren't pretty, the requests and demands from every corner of my life (including from some people who just SHOULD HAVE KNOWN BETTER) came in at lightning speed, the laundry was stacked in (clean) heaps, the mouths were fresh, the floors were filthy,  the screaming went on and on and the self centeredness just carried me clearly all the way across to the Cuckoo's Nest. 

I popped the little people to bed, told the big people to "deal with it", and left the house.  I called my best girlfriend, cried for a while, and went to dinner by myself.  My husband met me, and we had, duh-duh-duh, "A CHAT", which, really, meant that I laid down the law.  And so Sunday was - cool.

I woke with a headache, which wasn't cool, but laid around for two hours, which was.  I went for a pedicure, a lip and eyebrow wax, went for a walk, and went for a massage with my last gift certificate. The masseuse - who I would marry if I went that way and wasn't already hooked up - gave me the single best massage, including the one I had last week - for TWO HOURS.  My gift certificate was for 1.5 hours - she went above and beyond.  I adore her. When I could walk, I stumbled my way out to the car, stopped at the grocery - where I discovered that HoneyCrisp apples are back in the store !yay! - and came home.

To laundry done, floors cleaned, lunches packed, kids in bed, and kitchen immaculate. Sometimes, it pays to lose your shit once in a while.  To have the work done by others.  And that's the recipe for this week. Done by others. Some of you, specifically.  You've emailed me some great recipes, and I thought it was time that I share.  For your reading pleasure, below the fold. Please enjoy, while I revel in the fact that for the first time in a long time, I have no knots in my neck/shoulder area.

Now Seen Elsewhere

Many thanks to the kind powers that be over at Blog Nosh, who picked up my piece entitled "What do you owe the public?"

A piece I wrote for Deep South Moms, called "The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Night", in which I detailed a really fun sleepover gone horribly awry, was picked up on the MCT Syndicate feed - which means it was published in several newspapers and such online, like Kentucky.com, Sacbee.com, McClatchy-Tribune, Bradenton.com, Loraincountymoms.com, and FresnoBee.com, among others.

I've got a new post up at Zwaggle, talking smack about Halloween. Did you know that you can win a Wii, just for listing and trading?  It's too bad that I'm disqualified - snap to it, y'all - what a great holiday gift that'd be!

Being the weekend, it's all soccer, all the time for me. What's going on for you?

Toothless

 Two teeth, a day apart.  The first tooth that fell out, Gabriel encouraged her to put the tooth under her pillow, but tried to keep her hopes from being dashed.  "Remember, Emma, sometimes the tooth fairy forgets to come the first night.  You might have to wait until the second or third night."

How many times did the tooth fairy "forget" for you?

When a Phone Call Stops Your Heart

Thursday I waited after school for Emma to have her pictures taken with the soccer team.  I took the other kids to the playground.  It was a warm, sunny day, and Riley has finally made a few friends, who stay after in care.  They played and I read a magazine and talked with a few friends.  The Hubster was off work but he was completing some yard work and so I remained for a while longer, enjoying the day.  It was really nice to see Riley running and laughing.  I used my phone to take some pictures of her. 

As a totally random thought, five years ago, how many of you would have corrected me when I said I took a picture with my phone?  What changes will occur in the next five years that we can't even fathom today?

As I was making my way back to the bench, my phone rang.  It was my husband. 

"I was hammering and missed the nail.  I smashed my thumb with the sledgehammer.  I'm in so much pain I can't talk.  You've got to (groan) come home right now."  He hung up the phone.

I'll Take Categories for $1000

Thank you so much for your kind expressions of sympathy for my son.  The school has been amazing and I've been so pleased with how everything has been handled.  The entire school is still reeling from the shock, but one thing our school has in spades would be warmth towards each other.  Everyone has gone out of their way to be kind to each other, and the administration has gone WAY above and beyond in how they've dealt with the children.  Truly, the principal and the counselors have done an absolutely amazing job, and I've been so impressed with their character.

One thing I've noticed about this whole blogging thing is how different we all are.  We use different platforms, have different styles, and make different choices. Some of us use the partial post option, while some post the entire essay on the front.  You kind of have to follow your own thing.

I missed the boat a long time ago with regards to categories.  I've never used them on this site.  I do use them on Elff, but never got around to it here.  And that's where you come in.

I'd like to create categories, humorous ones that grab the attention and put a good spin on the entire thing.  Mir has some really phenomenal ones.  You guys, my faithful readers, were so helpful when I re wrote my "About me" over there on the right.  What category titles would you make up for me? 

Topics I write about would be, duh, my kids, my hubby, books, cooking,SID and autism, food allergies and asthma, stupid customer service, and, WHAT ELSE?

Can you help me?  Are you feeling creative? There are some giveaways in it for those with great ideas. 

A Follow Up to The BetchFest Post

The anonymous poster I hosted here for the Betchfest asked me to pass on this note to you all"

I just wanted to thank you again for posting my rant.  I read all the comments and appreciated everyone's thoughts, as diverse as they were.  It was hard not to respond b/c I am used to e-mailing or commenting back on my own blog.  I do not want to take up anymore time or space on your blog but please pass on my thank-yous.  It was really a unique opportunity to get suggestions from complete strangers.  I felt both relieved (I am not alone) and judged (your relationship/husband are bad).  Very interesting for me and lots to think about.  Thanks again.

My pleasure to help out.  If anyone else wants to have an anonymous space, I'm glad to host.

Explaining Death to an Eight Year Old

Anyone on Twitter this weekend may have seen my tweet Saturday afternoon:

Holy crap, universe. Enough already. My 8 year old son's teacher, who he loved more than life itself, DIED this morning. I give up.

It was completely unexpected, as these things almost always are, and hit me like a ton of bricks, as these things do.  I also loved his teacher.  We've been having some issues in the class, some struggles and difficulties, and she was so calm, patient and reassuring.  She loved the kids and loved to teach and was a wonderful, wonderful person in all ways and in all things.  In just four weeks, she had SUCH a handle on my son, was able to read him and know how he'd react in a situation.  She had such a gift.

My son has taken this really hard.  This is the first death I've had to explain to him.  I've talked about death, certainly, and I've explained death to my older kids before.  But this was different and this has been brutal.  We've had a rough couple of days and he was adamant in his desire to not return to school. He's been equally adamant that he will attend the funeral.  There's no negotiation there.

I'm so, so sad.  I hurt for the family, for the teachers that she worked with, for the hole she left in the school and for all of the children whose lives she touched and how they will be affected.  I hurt for myself, and especially for my son, who cried himself to sleep the first night.

Rest In Peace, Wonderful Third Grade Teacher. 

Housekeeping, Zwaggle Style

Anyone want to hear my voice?  Check out this podcast, where I ramble on and on about the beauty of the Zwaggle site.  NOTE:  I have yet to listen to it, and probably never will.  I HATE to hear my own voice.  Someone go listen and tell me how it is, ok?

This idea is crazy phenomenal, and helloo!  Winter Holidays are coming up.  Will you be the hero of the season by bringing home a Wii, at no cost to your (heavily hit, just like mine!) wallet? I'm going to list all of the Halloween costumes we have upstairs that aren't being used - if you list on Zwaggle, let me know.  The reader of mine who completes the most trades will win a prize.  Maybe a lazy son. 

Wouldn't that be the prize that keeps on giving?

Making Life (Or At Least Mealtime) Easier, Volume Four

One food that I like to keep on hand is cereal.  We buy boxes and boxes of it every shopping trip - Rice Krispies, Cheerios (regular, multi grain, fruity), Life, Kix, Puffins, Raisin Bran Crunch - the list goes on and on.  I'm not a huge fan of cereal my own self, but have been known to eat a bowl late at night when I'm so hungry that my "big 'uns are eating my little 'uns", as my dad used to say.  (Huh.  I never understood what that meant, and I still don't.  Anyone?  Bueller?)

I've never been able to find a granola that I really like, though.  I've had to steer clear of a lot of it, because Gabriel is allergic to coconut, peanuts and all tree nuts, and, well, how many granola recipes do you know out there without some of at least one of those?  I was thrilled when my sister in law gave me her recipe for granola, which was phenomenal; I'm not posting it here, as I've already done so. (If you haven't seen it, leave a comment and I'll mail it to you.)  A few months ago, I discovered a new recipe for granola, and it became my very-close-to-perfection almost favorite.  It's a completely different version than my sister in law's - it's chocolate and tart all at once and sometimes I'll eat it as dessert with vanilla yogurt.  Or, maybe, just by itself in a baggie with my fingers as I scoot down the road to soccer practice.

Because I'm Klassy that way.