Happy, Happy to ME

I went back and forth today. Do I post it, or do I avoid it?

See, Sunday is my birthday and I made a cake for myself.

My girlfriend asked me why I made my own cake. Surely, she said, Nik or Allegra, or even Mackenzie are old enough to make a cake for you. You shouldn't have to make your own cake!

But I am, uh, fussy and um, high maintenance and I wanted a CERTAIN type of cake made a CERTAIN way and I am PIGHEADED enough to think that I'm the only person who can do certain things.

So I made my own cake, but it didn't come out correctly. Because I don't have the correct pan - I've been slowly replacing my cheaper pans with the Williams-Sonoma Goldtouch pans, pans that each and every time turn out amazing products - but all of my good pans were in use and I pulled, from waaaaaayyy in the back of the cabinet - the old, cheap aluminum pans - the ones you find on the clearance rack, the ones I started out with WHEN I WAS FIRST MARRIED.And I haven't used them for years and years, and didn't even remember I had them.

Why do I still have those pans? I dunno. I certainly bake enough that I owe it to myself to get the good stuff, and so WHY haven't I replaced them yet?

So. the delicious cake batter baked into a dry, crumbly cake topped with delicious buttercream and covered with 41 candles.

And when I saw this picture, I thought to myself, Ye Gods, do I look my age. What the heck is that with the creases on my face? And it looks like a literal inferno in front of you.

Get the fire extinguisher, Mom. 41 candles is just too many candles.

Here's to me. To achey knees, asthmatic lungs, and not enough sleep. To "needs more coffee" and "no longer can skip meals" and "may or may not think about fiber more than she should". To, just maybe, this next year earning my black belt AND getting one of the three manuscripts I've written published. Not to mention that maybe THIS year I can master the pull up, run a less than 10 minute mile, manage to keep my laundry caught up, and not stree so much about the small stuff.

For it's ALLLLL SMALL STUFF.

Here's to more cooking, less stressing, and an enjoyable weekend. I had a great night last night, out with a girlfriend for crepes and martinis, went to a Bar Mitzvah for a close neighbor, have a wonderful fancy and formal party tonight, and brunch with my workout buddies on Sunday. It's a GREAT weekend. After all, it's not every weekend one gets to dress up twice in a fancy dress, is it?

Happy 41st Birthday to me.

(as a birthday gift to me, I'd really love to know what I've written that you enjoyed. Was there one post that really spoke to you? One that you thought I did a good job on? One you made your spouse or friend read? You don't have to tell me all the times I missed the mark - I know that'd be MUCH easier. But it's not every day a girl turns 41, so humor me. :)

 

Comments

[jp]

I have been reading you for some time now. I find many posts speak to me, mainly because you speak to us - the normal mom. You write from the heart about the complex, the poignant, the light-hearted, and the down right funny and ridiculous. You give a glimpse into your life and make us realize that no matter how we are all different, we are all the same - striving to be better moms, wives, friends, employees and ourselves - and trying to enjoy the trip along the way.

Congrats on the birthday - you are a brave woman, after 40 I no longer put ALL the candles on my cake!

[Headless Mom]

I love everything you write, silly girl. Have a spectacular day!

[Beth C]

Yeah what she said,lol. But really, I love everything you write too, that's why I read it all and I can't pinpoint a certain one. You've made me laugh and cry, sometimes all at the same time! I hope your birthday is awesome and if it made you happy to bake your own cake, that's all that really matters!

[maggie]

From most recently, I would go with What Does Dinner Look Like In Your House? because it was a true and honest slice of life.

[Megan]

Happy birthday! I liked What Does Dinner Look Like as well. There was also one you did awhile back where Riley said something rude to McKenzie and McKenzie got upset, that I really enjoyed. I think it was called "The Day Feelings Got Hurt." It was just so much like childhood and so nicely written.

And, um, wow. Did you really put 41 candles on that cake!

Riley and Emma really resemble you in that picture.

[Wendy]

Now how are we supposed to pick just one? There is no way I could do that. I have been reading you for probably a few years now, really, I'm not sure when I found your blog, but I could never pick just one. I know that I went back and started reading through all of your old posts, from the very first one on here, so I just don't think there is any way I could pick just one, I just love them all.

[Lisalyn S.]

Happy Birthday, Carmen. I hope you have a joy-filled birthday and I hope this next year proves fruitful. As far as a favorite.....well, that's tough, but I have to admit that when I see you on Twitter or FB, I always think of your husband's $10 velcro shoes and smile.

Lisa @ All That and a Box of Rocks

[CJ]

I couldnt say just one post that is my favorite...I read a lot of blogs, but only come back to a few select, and yours is one that Ive been coming back to every time you post something new. You are always inspiring, even when you dont think you are - Happy Birthday, hope you have a wonderful one.

[Jamie]

Happy birthday, Carmen!

[Kristi]

Happy Birthday! I began reading in February near the time my mother passed away following a 5 year battle with lung cancer. The post the got me hooked was "Dear Children." It was exactly what I was feeling at the time. Thank you for sharing so much and enjoy your day!

[Katherine]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRLY! I have some birthday Lush for you - I'll send it in Monday - sorry I didn't get it there Friday.

My favs? The laugh out loud ones -
-You flashing everyone in the boat.
-The kids cutting hair.
-You having to get waxed when you didn't think you had to... THAT was AWESOME

And all your amazing cooking pix....

Happy birthday to a beautiful, creative and fantastic Mom!

[Brandy]

Happy Birthday Carmen! I'd have to say my favorite post is the one you wrote about not putting yourself down and every other post you've written. Blessings and Best Wishes!

[Patti]

i think you are awesome... the list is too long to pick just one post..so happy birthday!! enjoy it!

[Becki]

Happy birthday, Carmen! A couple of years ago (maybe my 41st, in fact) I was making my birthday cake, and my husband expressed concern that I was making my own cake.

"Who is the best baker in the house?" I asked. "Well, you are," he replied.

"And don't I deserve the best?"

He couldn't argue with that.

As to your birthday request--I just enjoy your writing so consistently, that I can't come up with any one thing. Sorry to disappoint, but it truly is, as they say, "all good."

[Janelle]

I love all of your posts, but the one that spoke to me was the one where you were giving advice to a reader about how to get started on weight loss. Good Advice. I felt like you could have been talking to me!

[Christal]

Happy Birthday. I've enjoyed all I've read, but the last blog that had me laughing was this one "I Will Not Kill Him, I Will NOT Kill Him" because I could so see it happening at my house. Most of the time leftovers just languish, but if I plan for it and anticipate it... I can count on it being gone when I go back for it.

[Laura Horner]

Happy, happy birthday woman! Sounds like a totally awesome birthday weekend. Hmmm... my favorite post... sorry, but I don't have a specific favorite. How about if I just say you are my favorite blog? LOL Because so much of what you write just totally strikes a chord with me. You are brave enough, honest enough, to sometimes admit to feelings and thoughts that I share but I'm too chicken to say them. And things are always so well written, that the words and the emotions behind those words just flow. I wasn't sure, when I started reading your blog, that I'd have anything in common. You have 4 children more than I have, for starters. So I was happy to discover that, number of kids notwithstanding, we are Moms. And all the wonderful, crazy things that goes along with that!

[KG]

ONE of my fave posts by you best accessorized with a box of Kleenex:
The one you won critical acclaim for at Blogher: Dont borrow trouble....

Most of your posts have me laughing so hard, anyone within ear shot asks me if I'm ok. The roll of paper towels decorated with sharpie marker...which naturally transferred to table underneath.

The posts that showcase your fierce love and pride for your children, their birthday posts.

I love the ones about your husband power washing loving messages into fences or leaving your favorite jugs of juice in a heart shape on the counter for you.

Your blog just reaffirms for all of us that no matter what insanity, borderline tragedy, hilarity, exhaustion of epic proportions we endure.... Our love for our family stays strong and true. And is often enjoyed with good food!

You really put yourself out there, here in your personal space. And your thoughts and feelings are open to criticism and unkind comments and judgement. Just know that I respect your writing, your willingness to share and appreciate very much the time you have taken to do so. Even if sometimes I don't make the best choices!

Hope you have a very happy birthday!

[J from Ireland]

Happy Birthday Carmen. Have a great day. I love reading all your stuff far too difficult to choose one xx

[addy]

Happy Birthday Carmen! Enjoy your dress-up weekend (insert jealousy here)Your posts put it out there for all to read. And we do! Recently the thrift shop trip was great. Thanks for sharing.

[Nicki]

Happy Birthday! Oh boy, there is no way I could pick one favorite post; there are just too many to choose from. :) Honestly, I like reading here because you are one of us. You are a mom with all of the same struggles and triumphs and what-the-heck moments that we all encounter...maybe with a few more kids than some of us, but we can all relate. You could very easily be our friend or sister or neighbor. Thank you for being willing to share with us your writing because I think you have touched an awful lot of people.

As for the cake, heck why wouldn't you bake your own? I love my family, but there is no way on earth I would let them bake my birthday cake.

[sandy]

Seriously, I love the positivity in your posts. You manage a large family, have dealt with a major health issue, and have juggled finances and you deal with all this things with grace. You come across as someone who I would love to be friends with if you lived near me! I think you manage to bring your life and thoughts to the pages here....and your words make me smile, wonder and appreciate!! Keep it up Carmen....and Happy Birthday...You look fabulous!

[Elizabeth]

Happy Birthday! You are doing better at 41 than I am at almost 43 (in Jan).

As for my favorite posts, there are too many. I love that you are real. You aren't afraid to admit when you're unsure, screwed up something, angry, or done something right!

You remind me of me but more organized and together. Seriously, I only have 1 kid and can't keep up with him, work, and all the other stuff going on. That you do it with 6 amazes me constantly! And still have time to exercise....

[maggie]

Happy birthday,Carmen! I always enjoy reading here and appreciate your honest remarks about how things really are! I cannot think of one specific post at the moment but just know that since I've started working outside the home again I've had to delete quite a few blogs I've enjoyed reading for lack of time. You are the first blog I've ever checked out and kept on reading! And it all started with that Real Simple back page profile! Enjoy the weekend!

[LizP]

I make my own birthday cake too ... Until my mom moved up here, I made my own birthday dinner too. You are not alone :-)

There isn't one specific post you've written that spoke to me. It just helps me to know things will be ok because if Carmen handled it with 6 kids, I can handle it with 4 (3, now that one flew the coop).

Happy Birthday!!!