GYN LSMFT

Just a random set of letters - no meaning there. I always feel slightly ridiculous spelling out GYN.

Monday morning began with an emergency run to Wal-Mart, my least favorite store, to grab toilet paper, as our entire house was empty of the necessity - and the only tissues we had on hand were those Vick's ones - and that is just a story that I did not want to have to blog here. (I've done it, by accident - I most emphatically do NOT recommend doing this again.)

Tuesday morning began with an early in the morning appointment for my yearly examination - and not the kind for which you need a No.2 pencil. Ah, well, two cranky mornings mean that the rest of the week has lots of room for improvement, yes?

I made my necessary preparations (i.e. I showered and shaved and took care that my person in its entirety was pleasant) and drove to the office.

I happen to use a midwife, who I adore beyond all rightful compare. She delivered my last two babies and the care I received from her during the pregnancy, delivery and after was without compare. I've referred friends to her. She requests that I send her a Christmas card with a picture of my kids every year, and when I step into her office, I see my kids, in cards from the past 6 years, posted on her wall. I also see several press clippings about me posted there. It's like a little shrine or something, and while it's embarrassing, it's also kind of cool. She spends a long time in the appointment (today was no exception, as we chatted for quite a while about autism and immunizations and how each and every one of my kids is doing, and she gave me props for my weight - something I was really worried about - and my fitness.) and I just love the care I receive from her.

While waiting in the foyer before the appointment, I posted this Twitter status update:

Twitter poll: I have an appt with the gyn today. (you're welcome for that bit of TMI) SO- clothes folded neatly or tossed on chair?

I received lots of replies, most of whom offered that they fold their clothes and tuck their unders inside the pants - probably to avoid embarrassment, which is something I totally do, because it's ok to me that I'm making eye contact with a woman whose hands are wrist deep in my hoo-haa, but God forbid she see my Victoria's Secret lacy panties.

I was weighed and measured, peed in the little cup (NOT on my hand - SCORE!), gave my blood, blood pressure read at 100/60, heart rate set at mid 60's and had all the other screenings done. I was still tossing over the day's big decision - toss in the chair or fold?  What to do?? - and before I knew it, I'd been left in the room all alone with what was a really lovely pink gown - and then I knew I had to make up my mind quickly. Fold or toss. Fold? Toss? Tuck the unders or leave them out, exposing myself to scrutiny shamelessly?

Neither. I used the hook. I'd never seen that before, and one twitter follower told me that she solved the dilemma this way - and so, the pressure was off. No more worrying about folding, no more hiding the panties tucked safely away in your jeans, no trouble at all. Just hang everything up and go about your business without worry, able to meet everyone in the eye with grace and a calm demeanor.

Except when your panties fall off the hook as your provider exits the room.

 

 

Comments

[Joelle]

at least it was when she was exiting the room and not when she was entering ;-)

[Jennifer]

Oh my goodness! You definitely had me in tears, I was laughing so hard reading this! And I am totally going to check for a hook next time (I am a toss, but with my panties wrapped nicely inside my pants kind of girl). But I am always open to new methods!

[Megan]

Thanks for the laugh! And...there's a hook?

I love how the "what to do with the clothes and undies" is such a universal thing that women share. And guys probably have no idea. (Though I'm wondering if they think about the same thing. Probably not.) I personally fold my clothes in kind of a sloppy way (so that it doesn't look like I actually thought about it) and then put the undies on the bottom.

[Sabz]

My doc office has the hook (actually two-er) so that's what I use. Otherwise most def fold. :)) the last sentence cracked me up. Thx for the laugh. :)

[Tara]

My doctor has a small closet in his rooms where you can stuff everything. Makes me think he doesn't want to see my delicates any more than I want them to be seen.

[Lesli]

I'm one the of "casually drape on a chair with the underwear hidden within the folds" type of gals. The thought of hanging my stuff on a hook doesn't work for me, as my first vision is of previous patients hanging their underwear directly on that same hook...yuck. Why that squeamishness doesn't translate to the chair situation is a question I can't answer.

[kyooty]

I'm so behind in under the hood testing here.

[Laura H]

I neatly fold the jeans, then carefully tuck the panties in them. Then the shirt is neatly folded, or neatly tossed over the chair. My hubby was with me one time, and he noted how carefully I hid my panties. He was baffled, saying "he's about to have his hands in your stuff, and you don't want him to see your PANTIES??" I couldn't explain to him either. We just laughed.

[Brandy]

I neatly fold and hide the unmentionables. Heck, I even go so far as to line my shoes up neatly under the chair. Yeah, I know I'm weird.

[Rox]

I went to my gynlsmft today, just for a recheck of my tatas since the doc found a lump last time I was there ... and even after a mammogram and an ultrasound gave me the all-clear, she was so convinced something was there that I had to return. In other words, I go to a doctor who likes to feel me up.

Anyway, when told to undress, I eyed that hook cautiously, and hung up my bra, tee, and hoodie ... then undid everything, stuffed my bra into my hoodie pocket, and hung it up again. Twice. Carefully.

Carmen, you've given me gynlsmft-hook neurosis.

(BTW, my girls were in fine working order; no lump, indeed!)

[HolyMama!]

i fold, tuck undies out of sight (although, thanks, NEVER before considered how odd that was til now!), and leave my very cute shoes in plain sight so the dr will comment and we can discuss our shared love of shoes while she messes with the speculum thingie.

[angie]

I am almost always on my period when I visit the midwife, to add insult to injury. I tuck and hide to the best of my ability. I think she turns her head to avoid embarrassment as well.